I read an article recently that was originally published online at Inc.com. The article was written by Jeff Haden and was posted on September 20, 2012. I often print and save articles that I find interesting and applicable in my life. This article was entitled "The Ten Habits Of Remarkably Charismatic People". As I read this article, I thought it could apply to how I live my life. I am not looking to become a "remarkably charismatic" person. I am a bit past the point in life trying to impress or satisfy all who cross my path. I did, though, see how utilizing these suggestions just might improve my life and the lives of those with whom I have interactions.
So many times I have spent time with seniors who are obviously unhappy. Their lives are not what they hoped for and they in turn do not spend much time thinking about anyone except themselves. I am sure many of you have experienced the same thing. The talk is endlessly of this illness, condition, ailment or how they are not taken seriously by their family or associates. I have been on both sides of this situation. Listening to the complaints of others and I am sure voicing my dissatisfaction to others. The result I have found is that when I consistently complain to people I am not viewed as a person very pleasant to be around.
The article addresses ten social habits that are often associated with charismatic people. As I stated above, I am not trying to become the world's most charismatic man. I would like, though, to be a person who is pleasant to be around and that people look forward to seeing. I will briefly summarize the habits below:
-They listen more than they talk. They ask questions, smile, frown and generally really interact with others. Show the other person that you are interested and that they are important.
-They don't practice selective hearing. They don't consider some people to be beneath them and not worthy of listening to.
-They put their stuff away. They focus on the conversation. They give their full attention not pausing to answer their cell phone or work on their tablet.
-They focus on what they can give rather than what they will receive. Focusing on what you can provide will help to cement a real relationship.
-They don't act self-important. The only people impressed with your self-importance are others who are impressed with their own self-importance.
-They realize that others are important. They are important as they have something to offer you.
-They shine the spotlight on others.
-They choose their words carefully. The words you use impact how others think of you. Positive as opposed to negative words can help others feel good about themselves and you to feel better about yourself.
-They don't criticize others. They don't laugh at other people. Criticizing others or laughing at others only plant seeds of doubt as to your genuineness.
-Finally, they are not afraid to admit their own failings. They are humble and willing to share their faults and mistakes.
As I review the ten items listed above, I remind myself that how I am welcomed by others is greatly dependent on how I treat and think about others. If I want to be that person who is welcomed into a crowded room, I should make a genuine effort to become less self-centered and more involved in the interests and feelings of others.
So many times I have spent time with seniors who are obviously unhappy. Their lives are not what they hoped for and they in turn do not spend much time thinking about anyone except themselves. I am sure many of you have experienced the same thing. The talk is endlessly of this illness, condition, ailment or how they are not taken seriously by their family or associates. I have been on both sides of this situation. Listening to the complaints of others and I am sure voicing my dissatisfaction to others. The result I have found is that when I consistently complain to people I am not viewed as a person very pleasant to be around.
The article addresses ten social habits that are often associated with charismatic people. As I stated above, I am not trying to become the world's most charismatic man. I would like, though, to be a person who is pleasant to be around and that people look forward to seeing. I will briefly summarize the habits below:
-They listen more than they talk. They ask questions, smile, frown and generally really interact with others. Show the other person that you are interested and that they are important.
-They don't practice selective hearing. They don't consider some people to be beneath them and not worthy of listening to.
-They put their stuff away. They focus on the conversation. They give their full attention not pausing to answer their cell phone or work on their tablet.
-They focus on what they can give rather than what they will receive. Focusing on what you can provide will help to cement a real relationship.
-They don't act self-important. The only people impressed with your self-importance are others who are impressed with their own self-importance.
-They realize that others are important. They are important as they have something to offer you.
-They shine the spotlight on others.
-They choose their words carefully. The words you use impact how others think of you. Positive as opposed to negative words can help others feel good about themselves and you to feel better about yourself.
-They don't criticize others. They don't laugh at other people. Criticizing others or laughing at others only plant seeds of doubt as to your genuineness.
-Finally, they are not afraid to admit their own failings. They are humble and willing to share their faults and mistakes.
As I review the ten items listed above, I remind myself that how I am welcomed by others is greatly dependent on how I treat and think about others. If I want to be that person who is welcomed into a crowded room, I should make a genuine effort to become less self-centered and more involved in the interests and feelings of others.
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